The 27-Year-Old Who Wants You to Stop Avoiding the Death Conversation

Most people don’t think about their own end-of-life plans until they have to. Katherine (Kate) Ivanova, co-founder of Pantio, started planning hers at 27. Not out of fear, but out of curiosity, and a childhood spent in a family where death was never a forbidden subject. On a recent episode of the Digital Legacy Podcast, Kate shared how she came to Pantio not as a founder first, but as a client: “I immediately thought, hey, I really want this for myself and for my dad.” Her conversation with host Niki Weiss is a rare, honest look at why waiting for the right moment to have these conversations may be the biggest mistake we make. Shifting Perspectives on Death Every individual carries a unique story, filled with values, experiences, and wisdom. Yet many of us shy away from documenting and sharing them. Kate's own upbringing was characterized by an open dialogue about mortality. Her parents fostered an environment where discussions about loss were woven into everyday life. This upbringing instilled in her a view that the topic of death should not be taboo, but rather an inevitable part of life that we should address openly. "It took a while to come to peace with those thoughts," Kate admits, "and I think in a way they're still, well, scary for me." Growing up in a household where her parents would casually remind their kids that they were "actually not gonna be here forever" and to enjoy the moment, Kate learned early to sit with that fear rather than avoid it. What surprises her most today is that so few others have had the same chance: "I'm very surprised that people my age, their parents are gonna die and they're not even aware of it. Why is nobody talking about this?" That gap between the open dialogue she grew up with and the silence she sees around her is exactly what drives her work in end-of-life planning.

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Most people don’t think about their own end-of-life plans until they have to. Katherine (Kate) Ivanova, co-founder of Pantio, started planning hers at 27. Not out of fear, but out of curiosity, and a childhood spent in a family where death was never a forbidden subject.

On a recent episode of the Digital Legacy Podcast, Kate shared how she came to Pantio not as a founder first, but as a client: “I immediately thought, hey, I really want this for myself and for my dad.” Her conversation with host Niki Weiss is a rare, honest look at why waiting for the right moment to have these conversations may be the biggest mistake we make.


Shifting Perspectives on Death

Every individual carries a unique story, filled with values, experiences, and wisdom. Yet many of us shy away from documenting and sharing them. Kate's own upbringing was characterized by an open dialogue about mortality. Her parents fostered an environment where discussions about loss were woven into everyday life. This upbringing instilled in her a view that the topic of death should not be taboo, but rather an inevitable part of life that we should address openly.

"It took a while to come to peace with those thoughts," Kate admits, "and I think in a way they're still, well, scary for me." Growing up in a household where her parents would casually remind their kids that they were "actually not gonna be here forever" and to enjoy the moment, Kate learned early to sit with that fear rather than avoid it. What surprises her most today is that so few others have had the same chance: "I'm very surprised that people my age, their parents are gonna die and they're not even aware of it. Why is nobody talking about this?" That gap between the open dialogue she grew up with and the silence she sees around her is exactly what drives her work in end-of-life planning.


The Role of Technology in Capturing Legacy

At the heart of Pantio's mission is the belief that identity is an asset. Instead of vanishing, people can curate how they are remembered. Utilizing technology, Pantio offers a platform to capture a person’s authentic voice, values, and memories in an interactive manner.

The process begins with personal interviews, once conducted live via Zoom, but now tailored to be intuitive and engaging. As Kate describes, “Every person deserves a spotlight like this to talk about what matters to them.” This platform not only facilitates conversations but also allows loved ones to feel connected and engaged even after physical loss occurs.


A Personalized Approach to Legacy Preservation

The Pantio experience is designed to be as individual as the lives it commemorates. Users can upload recordings, photographs, and even written notes. Everything is carefully cataloged in a secure digital format that can be accessed by family members. This thoughtful approach remains sensitive to the complexities of mortality while addressing the digital age's unique realities.

Kate explains, "We can use voice cloning and AI technology to ensure that what is generated sounds like the person, allowing their essence to endure." This blend of technology and empathy fosters a comforting dialogue when it may be needed most.


Breaking the Taboo: Making Planning a Norm

Both Kate and Niki emphasize the importance of having these conversations well before a crisis hits. By treating end-of-life planning as a normal aspect of life, akin to managing financial assets or health care. Individuals can alleviate burdens for their loved ones and create a dialogue that enhances relationships.

“Why don’t we integrate some of these legal practices from financial points into this part of our lives?” Kate urges. “We should start having these conversations while everything is good, not waiting until it's too late.”


Steps to Begin Your Own Digital Legacy

  1. Spark the Conversation: Start by discussing your hopes and wishes with family members in an open, honest, and casual way. Share your interest in documenting family stories and memories.

  2. Explore Tools Together: Look into platforms like Pantio that allow for the preservation of digital legacy. Consider setting up a family account to start capturing stories together.

  3. Reflect on Your Values: Take the time to think about what you would like to leave behind. What lessons, experiences, and memories would you want to share with future generations?

By changing the narrative surrounding death and actively engaging in discussions about our digital legacies, we not only prepare for the future but also enrich the lives of those around us.


Stop Leaving Chaos Behind 

The conversation with Kate Ivanova reminds us that while legacy planning can feel daunting, it is the ultimate act of care for those we love. You don't have to figure it all out at once. You just need a starting point.

If you're ready to move from "I should do this" to "It’s handled," we’ve made it simple. Claim your FREE Assessment & Action Plan here to get total clarity on your digital legacy and finally take control of your future. You’ll walk away with a personalized roadmap that turns the "what ifs" into a clear, manageable plan.

For more poignant insights, listen to the full episode featuring Kate Ivanova on the Digital Legacy Podcast. You can also connect with Kate directly via Pantio’s website or her LinkedIn.



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Finding Joy in the Journey: A New Vision for Pediatric Care and Legacy

When a child receives a difficult diagnosis, the world does not just tilt: it shatters. For Jonathan Cottor and his wife, that moment came when their son, Ryan, was diagnosed with Spinal Muscular Atrophy at just eight months old. They were told he might not live to see his second birthday. It is a weight no parent should ever have to carry alone, yet it is the reality for thousands of families across the country. Recently, Jonathan sat down with Niki Weiss on the Digital Legacy Podcast to share his family's extraordinary seventeen-year journey with Ryan. His story is not just about a diagnosis: it is a beautiful reflection on how we can find joy, community, and a lasting digital legacy even in the face of the unthinkable. Through his son's life, Jonathan has become a champion for better support systems for medically fragile children. Redefining Hospice as a Place for Living In the early days of Ryan's diagnosis, the word hospice felt like a door closing. Like many parents, Jonathan and his wife associated the term with giving up or the immediate end of life. They resisted the idea of seeking help from Helen House, a children's hospice in London, for many months. However, they soon learned that pediatric palliative care is actually about living as fully as possible. Palliative care is specialized support focused on providing relief from the symptoms and stress of a serious illness. It offers psychosocial and emotional help for the entire family. It is not about dying: it is about helping a child and their parents find happiness while navigating complex medical needs. The 24/7 Reality of Caregiving Caring for a child with a rare genetic disease is an exhausting, round the clock job. Jonathan describes it as caring for a newborn who never grows out of that level of dependency. Because Ryan could not move himself, his parents had to flip his position every hour throughout the night to keep him comfortable. This level of care makes deep, restorative sleep nearly impossible for parents. This is where respite care becomes a lifeline. Respite care is a short break for caregivers, giving them a chance to rest and recharge while their child is cared for by professionals in a home-like setting. Those few nights of sleep allowed Jonathan and his wife to catch up and face the next set of challenges with fresh energy. Building a Legacy from a Gaming Chair Ryan may have been physically restricted, but his digital world was expansive and vibrant. He was a self-described "techno nerd" and a passionate gamer who built his own gaming computer with his father. For Ryan, technology acted as a bridge, allowing him to interact with the world just like any other teenager. Through his YouTube channel and gaming accounts, Ryan built a community and an influencer presence. Even though he passed away at 17-years old, his digital footprint remains a comforting gift for his family. Even today, Jonathan finds peace in visiting Ryan's YouTube channel to hear his voice and see his "goofiness" whenever he needs a dose of his son's spirit. From Personal Grief to a National Movement Ryan's life served as the North Star for a movement that is now changing healthcare in America. When Jonathan moved his family back to Phoenix, he was shocked to find that the United States lacked the community-based children's hospice models he had seen in England. This led to the creation of Ryan House, a place where families can find respite, palliative care, and end-of-life support. Today, Jonathan leads the National Center for Pediatric Palliative Care Homes. He is working to scale these models across the country, advocating for new healthcare licenses and policy changes. His goal is to ensure that every family caring for a medically fragile child has access to a "home away from home" that focuses on quality of life and joy. A Hopeful Path Forward Jonathan's journey reminds us that even in the most difficult seasons, we are not alone. There is a growing coalition of leaders and families working to make the healthcare system more compassionate for children. Whether you are a caregiver today or planning for the future, taking small, intentional steps can make a world of difference. You do not have to have all the answers right now. You just have to start where you are. Here are a few practical ways to begin: Set Your Legacy Contact: Take five minutes today to identify a legacy contact in your phone settings to protect your digital memories. Explore Local Resources: Visit the Children's Respite Homes website to see what support systems might be available or in development in your community. Start the Conversation: Talk to your loved ones about what "quality of life" means to you, even if it feels uncomfortable at first. To hear Jonathan Cottor’s full, moving conversation with Niki Weiss, listen to the latest episode of the Digital Legacy Podcast. You can also learn more about his mission to support families at https://childrensrespitehomes.org/.

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